Pre-marital counseling is often recommended or required for many weddings that will occur within a religious institution. On one level, many couples want the opportunity to deal with some issues that could become a future problem for their marriage. Unfortunately, however, not all pre-marital ...read more
Grace Under Pressure
Grace: disposition to, or an act or instance of, kindness, courtesy, or clemency; mercy, pardon; a special favor; the quality or state of being considerate or thoughtful. (Merriam-Webster.com)We talk about God's grace, a dancer's grace and being in someone's good graces but we rarely use grace ...read more
Love Is a Risky Business
"You are imperfect, you are wired for struggle, and you are deserving of love and belonging." Brene Brown gives this excellent quote toward the end of her well known Ted talk on vulnerability. It's so hard to be vulnerable, isn't it? What if you are truly and totally you and you get rejected in ...read more
Familiarity Breeds Contempt…But It Doesn’t Have To.
Complacency and Contempt:Recently I heard someone say "familiarity breeds complacency", a slightly different version of the old saw "familiarity breeds contempt". It got me thinking about some of the most familiar of relationships and what can too easily happen to them.All relationships of any real ...read more
I Love You Just the Way You Are: The Power of Acceptance
One day the Sun and the Wind were having a bit of an argument about who was more powerful. Finally, they decided to have a contest to end the disagreement. The Wind noticed a woman wearing a light overcoat and said "Whoever gets that coat off the woman is the most powerful and wins." The Sun ...read more
Lean In and Create an Arch
Do you ever have days (or maybe weeks, months or even years) that start to feel like it’s all just a bit too much to manage? Recently I was talking with someone who has had life throw quite a few curve balls over the years and the response was “I’m tired!”. Sometimes life can make us tired and at ...read more
Married For a Day
As much as we all love weddings, it’s time to put them in their place. How do you think your new job would go if you stopped working at it once you got it? Regarding your kids...do you stop trying to “be a parent” once you have the baby? Wouldn’t it be ridiculous if you worked and earned the ...read more
Simple Ways to Make Your Partner Feel Heard and Understood
When you feel seen and acknowledged, what’s that like? You feel pretty good, right? If you notice someone looking at you, you straighten up and stand taller, adjusting yourself a bit; and if the person seeing you also loves and respects you, you feel a little glow. You shine brighter than if you ...read more
Six Building Blocks Of Healthy Relationships
Healthy, secure, loving, confident children: it’s a parent’s greatest hope. The path our children follow to become an adult is peppered with challenges and uncontrolled emotions. As Susan Stiffelman points out in her book Parenting Without Power Struggles, children want and need the security of a ...read more
Trading Fantasy For Real Life Relationships: Four Ways To Find Magic In The Daily Grind
It’s a trap we love to fall into: That Hollywood-style romance, famous in chick flicks, in which storm-tossed lovers run through airports, go back in time, or rediscover an old flame against ridiculous odds. You don’t need me to tell you those silver screen relationships aren’t real. You know very ...read more