People often ask what the most common issues are in marriage counseling and the generic answer is usually "communication". Digging deeper into what can create real conflict between partners, though, is a sense that both people aren't counting equally in the relationship. Not counting equally is a ...read more
Familiarity Breeds Contempt…But It Doesn’t Have To.
Complacency and Contempt:Recently I heard someone say "familiarity breeds complacency", a slightly different version of the old saw "familiarity breeds contempt". It got me thinking about some of the most familiar of relationships and what can too easily happen to them.All relationships of any real ...read more
“We’re Just SO Different!”
Why is it that the person you fall in love with is often completely different from you? You like to amble through life smelling the roses, and your partner moves at the speed of light. You’re gregarious and easy going, and your spouse is quiet and ultra productive. Yet, you are both attracted to ...read more
Six Building Blocks Of Healthy Relationships
Healthy, secure, loving, confident children: it’s a parent’s greatest hope. The path our children follow to become an adult is peppered with challenges and uncontrolled emotions. As Susan Stiffelman points out in her book Parenting Without Power Struggles, children want and need the security of a ...read more
The Conditions For Healing After An Affair
The unthinkable has occurred. One spouse betrayed the other. It was an affair, a “fling,” and office romance, a one-night stand, or “just one of those things…” In any case, it was unforgiveable. Or was it? You might be surprised to learn how many couples try to repair their relationship after an ...read more
Trading Fantasy For Real Life Relationships: Four Ways To Find Magic In The Daily Grind
It’s a trap we love to fall into: That Hollywood-style romance, famous in chick flicks, in which storm-tossed lovers run through airports, go back in time, or rediscover an old flame against ridiculous odds. You don’t need me to tell you those silver screen relationships aren’t real. You know very ...read more
The Best Way To Keep Your Partner In Love With You Forever
I’m going to tell you this and you’re going to be disappointed. It’s not some awesome sex trick, it’s not a diet or body makeover, it’s not a recipe you can whip up in the kitchen. It’s actually really simple, sweet, and small. Almost boring, this advice I have for you. But trust me, it transforms ...read more